Est 1983 - ON PRES: Robin Low
3rd February 2002
Run 469 Paul ‘Mussolini’ Mortimer - stepping in at the last moment
Stoughton - On the corner car park near Wildham Wood
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Run 469 - 3rd February 2002 - Bignor Hill - Paul ‘Mussolini’ Mortimer & Joyce ‘Invisible’ Porrett
You can tell that the winter season is upon us as each hash report starts with a tale of rain and wind. This run was no different as hardy hashers turned up to the car park at Stoughton to park in the local beauty spot next to the inevitable burnt out car.
The pack began to grow which was a surprise as it was thought that the Chichester 10K, run on the same day would whittle down the members but it was obvious that nobody at the hash was a serious enough runner to contemplate such an event. Hornblower Barty had brought along the hashit but after passing it along went back to the 10K. Old Faithful was still on the injured list but had brought along offspring to compensate but I think it a bit rich for him to need a personal bodyguard to keep him safe in the car park whilst we all run (Well done Rasta!). It was also good to see Hugh back again, especially as he had also brought small teenage female runner with him. Sue and Miriam started off by doing impressions of deep sea fisherman dressed in enough wet weather gear to conquer the strongest seas.
We had to have a quick pow wow regarding the next hash as we had lost Michael and Beth so Miss Perfect agreed to change her date and needed the run to consider her next location, which she managed by the end of the run. After the masters had introduced new hashers Caroline from Chichester and Beryl from Hong Kong (thanks to the Can Man), Mussolini informed us that the way was up. As we were at the bottom of a valley surrounded on all sides by hills this was a statement of the obvious but we accepted this useless information with grace and set out to find the trail. We struggled up one steep hill only to find a falsie and then another to find the same before Miriam led off down the trail along the road. We found the Doc turning up late at this point but being true hashers we left him to find his own way. The first check led us inevitably up along a muddy trail and into the woods proper. To set the tone of the day Action Man went bounding into the lead in complete silence (has he been talking to Whispers?) and had to be restrained on a couple of occasions. The trail led through mud, hills, more mud and even more hills. We came to a check and Action Man bounded forward whilst I expressed my doubt to Jan. “Don’t worry” she said “Paul does keep to the trials so it probably is the obvious trail”. DOH! Within minutes the trail was false and after much searching husband Sinbad found the true by leaving said trail and crashing through the undergrowth. Linda (the dog not the hasher) was let off the lead but the mud and rain dampened even her enthusiasm and the pack moved along at a gentle walk/jog up even more muddy hills.
Many members asked Caroline if she was enjoying herself, although why getting soaking wet and covered in mud should be enjoyment I do not know. However we do like to make newcomers feel welcome. So the trail continued with Invisible and Mussolini grinning and beaming like Cheshire cats every time we were wrong (which was most times) until finally we seemed to be approaching familiar ground. The pack turned back towards the chariots, except Whispers who did the decent thing and checked out an unlikely falsie and it was not long before hash flash bellowed On Inn! The bedraggled pack sloshed in and gathered round to hear nominees for the hashit but finally saw the award going to Whispers for watching the pack struggle up the hill on a falsie and refusing to join in.
We retired for apres hash at the Barley Mow where the pack commandeered a table in the pub which was marked reserved (and got thrown off fairly sharpish). An enjoyable if wet day. On On