The early hours of Sunday morning had a few hashers peering through their bedroom windows with fear and trepidation at the coming storms that they were to run through at 11 o’clock but in the event the rain had passed by then to leave a nice bright spring morning. After a few ‘odd’ hashes we were back to normal but as this had been announced by email rather than hash sheet the hares allowed an extra 5 minutes for everybody to turn up. This was just as well as Miss Perfect, the Hornblower and Linda (the lady not the dog) all turned up late and it was only by the pack’s generosity that they did not have to scurry after us.
The first task of the hare (who was also JM) was to announce that Dave Pancsi Enticott had passed the half century! We were also given the info that Adrain the Action Man was off to Northern Ireland with the RMPs (Is that contravening the official secrets act?). Final introductions were made to Eduardo (from Madrid) and Melanie (from Quebec) and we were ready to begin. So we set of to find the trail which Mussolini did immediately running uphill with most of the pack following. "On On" he called . "On up to this falsie!" Not funny.
So instead we came back down the hill and off in the other direction to find this was also false and the true trail was down a steep muddy track. As I was treading carefully downhill, Spiderman came rushing past in his cross country shoes boasting of added tread and I had no choice but to follow in the hope that I could report a good spill in the hash notes but no such luck - he survived. This proved to be the theme of the day - wet and muddy with big steep climbs. We trudged downhill and still further downhill dreading the inevitable uphill we knew was coming. At the bottom of one long hill an impromptu regroup was held were we were all amazed to find that Csilla ‘The Eskimo’ actually unzipped her running jacket with only 3 layers beneath her!
The uphill we went to slosh through more mud to an organised regroup. At this point ‘Pancsi’ was going to rush ahead but we held him back as it had to be explained that with 50 of his 3 score and 10 gone he should be more careful. He replied that if that was all the time he had left he was not going to waste it on a regroup! Still the pack waited for Treefeller, Miss Perfect and Rasta to catch up and then we were off. Action Man and yours truly sure that we were on the correct trail. Wrong. After a long falsie we realised that Old faithful had gone in the other direction and we had to catch up by RUNNING up hills to catch up.
Selwyn and the Can Man were puffing up the hill pacing themselves as the next check gave three choices of up! Dave ‘Hornblower’ took one trail and then SHORTCUTTED through to the pack rather than go back from whence he came! Is he GUILTY?
So after even more up and up we came upon the welcome ON IN and back to the cars where nominations were given for the hashit. Despite his shortcutting there was an even clearer candidate. As Miss Perfect was calling the dog "Linda" Linda (the person) kept answering. This was obviously confusing Linda (the dog and as such was both un-English and hashitable. So the hashit was awarded to Linda (the person) for impersonating the hash dog. To avoid this situation arising in the future Linda the dog can keep her name but Linda (the person) can be awarded a nickname. As she is so keen to answer to her name it would appear that DOGWHISTLE would be an apt title. Problem solved. On On!