Est 1983 - ON PRES: Robin Low
Just when we thought it could not get any hotter - it did!!
The pack were assembled at the Stoughton Down car park in blazing sunshine in what appeared to be the hottest hash day this year and true to form this brought out many fair weather hashers, returnees and newcomers to swell numbers considerably. There were a few horse boxes in the car park lowering the tone but after a short while they gave in to the sheer numbers of hashers and moved on leaving JM ‘The Chamois’ to offer apologies for the other JM Sue ‘Tigger’ Spooner who was toasting herself in the South of France. She handed over to Mussolini who gave us the usual hash lies - flat etc, etc., before sending the pack on their way with the instruction ‘if in doubt go up!’
As your Humble Scribe is slightly restricted from getting on the spot reports, a team of trained cub reporters brought back the news. What was the trail like ? Confusing, came the reply. It was never obvious and whenever you got to a check where there was a choice of two or more paths, both were wrong and it turned out to be a sneaky little trail hidden down a small track.
My response was - Well Done That Hare!
Although confusion is admirable there were a few disgruntled hashers who seemed to feel that a loop is not ‘playing the game’. However not all of them. After running the same falsie twice Hairbrush Barclay remarked how kind it was of the hares to give the pack the opportunity to see all of this beautiful countryside again just in case they had missed it first time around. True hash spirit shown there I say. In fact so true and honourable that the JM felt she had to nominate him for the hashit for honourable sentiments that showed his age.
The Malibog clan had turned up with a small 10 year old Mini Malibog showing the way to many seasoned hashers whilst the head of said clan blew on his whistle exhorting the pack to greater efforts. The Chamois was heard to remark that it would be nice to hear some calling. Memories of The Colonel bellowing "Lets ‘Ear You" respound in my head when I hear this. Take heed pack and lift your hash voices up on high lest the pack be scattered like lambs on a hillside........
Sorry about that, I am writing this on a Sunday and do not know what came over me.
However the hares did not have it all their own way. The Ladies division were seen short cutting at one point to avoid a muddy puddle and Mussolini called them SCBs as he had intended them to go straight through it but he should have realised that hashers are a devious bunch and lady hashers (is there such a thing?) are even more devious when it comes to keeping clean. For proof of this see Amanda the Panda - when did you last see her muddy?
Anyway the time wore on and those of us back at the car park where on hand to see Old Faithful come trotting in followed by the rest of the puffing pack. I was suspicious when the Polish division came in without a drop of perspiration on them but I thought that I would put it down to extreme youth. The pack were gathered and nominations offered but in the end it was Bambi who received the hashit for continually leading the pack and doing all of the falsies which may give the pack a bad name and spread the word that we are runners - Heaven forbid. On to the Barley Mow for apres hash in the sun. A good run on a nice day.
On On! Humble Scribe.