Well to start off with I would like to make it quite clear that supplying your Humble Scribe with a map in order to get a good write up is an underhand practice. The best way to obtain a good write up for your hash is to join the Concervative Party and then meet in Harrods with a plain brown envelope full of readies. Failing this buying the scribe a drink may work. I mean, if I read the map it would appear that the pack left heading north and then cut down Links Lane across a small forest turning down Castle Road (where incidentally my friend Harvey lives who owns Wiggle the bike shop in Portsmouth - please see me for further info so I can earn commission) and then into some more wooded areas across Gipsies Plain until you hit Durhams Road, cut through the alley and then into the houses again before going through the open land called Durrants hitting Drift Road to Redhill Road and finally back towrds the Green and the chariots.
But does this tell the full story? Nay and thrice Nay I say.
This is the bones of the run but where is the soul of the run?
For example we need to know that it was a beautiful summers day with the temperature in the 20’s and a large pack on the Green, with many faces returning to the pack.
We need to know that Jan’s attempt at sliding out of the task of carrying the hashit by not turning up, failed dismally and he had to fulfill his task and carry that honourable trophy.
What of the run itself?
The bare bones do not tell the story that needs to be told, of how the pack approached a check near the end with three choices. One onward and into the distance, one off to the left and one to the right. After both left and right had been checked the race for the horizon seemed the only course left open to our keen pack.
“Is it really across that field towards the woods in the distance?” one stunned hasher asked.
After being given an affirmative nod from one of the hares, they trudged unwillingly across the field only to find that the hares had not been that unkind because half way across the field there was another check and the option was there to turn left which in turn turned left again to return to the original check where the Panda and Tigger had stayed beaming like Cheshire cats.
The Chamois did the decent thing of course and ran the entire loop before coming back to the pack, most of whom had shortcutted.
There were a few comments that she should be nominated for the hashit as this ‘over and above the call of duty’ lark might be catching and give the pack a bad name for being ‘a bit keen’.
The problem about nominating a JM though is that they are at liberty to ignore all and any such nominations as is the privilege of their rank and such was the case in this instance.
So with the Hares attempt at trying to influence your Humble Scribe thwarted, I was free to glean the truth about the run from returning hashers. Good One was the most I could get out of them except that one thought that Evrim should be nicknamed ‘Coppertop’ but the naming committe rejected this on the grounds that next week she could well be blond! Oh well, On On!