Run	Date	Hare(s)	Description	MapRef	1:50000	1:25000	1:10000	More
889	2018-02-18 11:00	Bika & Kinky	Stoughton Village - Triangle	SU802114

Kinky said "we laid the trail yesterday, there has been a little rain this morning, let's hope its still there".

Then hashers started to arrive, each facing the challenge of where to tie up their chariot. We welcomed two returning visitors from Haunch Of Venison, Splash Back and Nappy Rash (their JM) while the dogs howled and barked uncontrollably and Prancer mumbled on about a load of dead people including Churchill who wrote a speech for a maiden to make to Trump and The Pope about wall building.

Then it was off north west on the slimy wet chalk footpath and then the soft sticky mud of the climb up from the church via the dog walker's path in the field. With unusual vigour Splasher, dutifully grasping the Hash-It, was at the head of the pack as we melded into the southern edge of Inholmes Wood.

Turning north we soon lost what little trail existed, forcing the hares to re-lay some sections to make our way along Holmes Row where Pocket Rocket had fun on a swing before leading a charge down over last year's stubble to Pitlands Farm.

North east then through the farm with Bambi and Old Faithful at the front, but not for long as they reached a fish hook for two, then the smile disappeared from the following bunch as they reached a fish hook for four. We noticed Brylcreem, Splash Back and Nappy Rash returning to the rear before discovering Spider Girl Emily hiding in a shed to avoid the extra exercise.

At the familiar T junction above the farm the hares had chosen the southerly route across the microlight landing strip and back into the trees for the steep rooty rocky climb to reach a regroup in the log piles on the crest.

After some time nattering, and gazing into the reflective pools of muddy water for inspiration, Bambi headed north east up the ridge to get a nice snap of the log ends and discovered the true trail, so the rest soon followed with Spiderman in front.

Time, as it does, was steadily ticking towards the hour, and most were thinking that we must surely head south soon. The hares however had other ideas and took us well off piste north along the ankle jarring top of an ancient hedgerow until we reached the easterly path to Wildham Barn.

Finally, we headed south, and such was the exuberance of the leading group, Bambi included, that they over-ran a very poorly crafted falsie and inadvertently took a short cut to a re-group at the bottom of Inholmes Wood. Here, to their surprise, they encountered Snake Charmer and Pocket Rocket who had taken an even shorter short cut.

It seemed like a century went by as we waited for the rest, Brylcreem bailed out muttering about a previous engagement, becoming a little yellow dot on the path back to the pub.

Prancer had just started back along the trail to look for them when the pack arrived to inform us of our wayward behaviour. In just a few cricket wicket lengths further we reached the On-In and scampered down to the back door of the pub, after one hour and thirty five minutes of very genteel and well mannered hashing.

A rectangle formed in the front garden of the pub and Prancer raked over the ashes of the hash. Of course the, Emily hiding in a shed, incident was near the top along with Nappy Rash referring to shiggy very politely as "adverse camber". I note that we omitted to thank the hares before what seemed like a purely arbitrary decision was made to give the Hash-It to Bambi on some trumped up accusation. Whatever it was, it did not happen, it was fake news.

We then wiped our feet and settled into the back bar of the Hare and Hounds, which on a Sunday is a very popular place and according to Splasher serves excellent beer from East Sussex. Bambi had slight difficulties being served, probably due the toilet seat around his neck ... ho hum.

On – On ! Bambi.

See: track